Sleigh Bells Announce New Album, Make Fun of Themselves

I have never been pro-Sleigh Bells because, well, I’d rather blow out my ear drums on a healthy dose of  rock n’ roll than the equivalent of nails on the chalkboard turned up to 11. Now some people disagree with me on that and argue with a “fuck you”, a “You just don’t get it, man” or my personal favorite, “You just don’t like dance music” (unsurprisingly, these people usually also like large quantities of dubstep). But no matter your opinion, you can’t deny the band is now officially on the fast track to becoming parodies. Exhibit one, their new single.

Born to Lose – Sleigh Bells

At least they got the title right, because whatever these two are doing, it sure isn’t winning. It sounds like a drunken session between a dubstep producer like Skrillex and one of those nu-metal guitarist dipshits from Linkin Park. I think it’s sloppy and loud to make up for the fact that they couldn’t write a melody to save their lives or that drum machines still blow. That’s already three strikes, and I haven’t gotten to the album announcement yet!

To add on to it, they’ve decided to name their album, Reign of Terror. With a name like that, I can see a lot of hipsters developing tinnitus when the album drops this Valentine’s Day. The best part has to be the description of the songs from the press release:

“they’re effortlessly robust and heavier than any of the band’s previous output … the sonic equivalent of a beautiful shotgun to the head.”

Did they really just compare their music to a shotgun blast to the head? Dude, it’s just too easy now.

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